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Sep 04, 2008

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Comments

Summer

So happy to see a post from you!! Good to know you and the Munchkin are doing well.

Personally, I would love to see you blog again about anything, as long as we get occasional updates on you and the Munchkin.

Jennifer

Still here :) Glad to hear life is going so well.

Lut C.

Great to hear from you. Amazing that you're still dealing with paperwork for Munchkin. For a moment I thought you were talking about a new adoption adventure.

Jenn

I'm happy you are happy :)

Tonya

SO glad to hear that you are all doing well! It seems like all that paperwork is so onerous. I am happy you are nearing the end of that part of the saga.

And of course, would love to hear about whatever is on your mind. Happy to see you back!

millie

Yay! It's always so very good to hear from you. I just can't help but smiling when I see a post, no matter how infrequent. I think your idea is stellar!

And, on a selfish note, I'd love to see you and/or Dimple Boy sometime soon. Say October?

Jennifer

Still keep your blog on Google Reader. So good to hear from you! Happy everything is going well for you and your family.

ivfcycler

thanks for the update, and for all you've shared. i knew to get a 2nd beta even after i got my period with a beta of 4, thanks to your site. the doctor was certainly surprised, yet admitted that come to think of it, she had seen an ectopic pregnancy after a beta <5 before.

Tracy

Great to see an update!! I have your site bookmarked and check it every so often to make sure it is still up. You are a wealth of information. I think doing an adoption blog would be a great idea. So glad that you and your family are doing great!!

starfish

Still here! Great to hear from you. Adoption is totally amazing, right? Our little one just turned two too! I'd read your blog no matter what you had to say, so go for it.

Regina

Thanks for the update. I have been following your blog for about three years now because I also had two ectopic pregnancies, one miscarriage and six failed IVF cycles. We finally decided to adopt from Korea as well and we started the procedure this year! (dossier sent in July 2008) Your blog has been so informative and also very moving. It touched my heart in many differnt levels, and I cried with sadness and joy while reading your blog. Congrats on your baby boy's progress again!

jb

just write -- I mean, the adoption info angle is probably always helpful but you have such a nice & easy style, and good info in general, I would like you to do more of a "mommy" blog -- ie, dealing with a 2 yr old, potty training -- life etc.

glad all is so well!!

Hazel Jones

Hi,

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If you are interested, kindly mail back at k5sino@bigstring.com, indicating your blog for reference, and I'll send you back pricing details, guidelines and processes. Looking forward to doing business with you.

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Peeveme

Hey,

Nice to see an update. We met at the 1st barronpalooza you organized. I was not blogging then but am now.

I'd like to hear both the adoption blog and you adventures in motherhood.

appleandmoses

Just found your blog. I am also going through a very similar "situation". I was brought up very proper and that's how we describe it, a "situation". Thanks. I have wanted to cry and scream and find comfort so many times through this journey but no one or no thing has brought as much comfort as reading your blog. I have laughed and cried reading your each of entries. I have ignored my work, my husband and my phone calls.

Thank you and congratulations on your baby boy. I hope you will continue writing and sharing your life.

Retro Girl (Angela)

Hello...
We're presently adopting a baby boy from Korea and found your blog when looking for timeline info. WOW your documentation is amazing. Thank you for publishing this!!

We are at the stage where our I600a is in process, just got the fingerprints yesterday to go along with it...agency says our referral could come at any time now...(between now and January we are guesstimating based upon their # of referrals per month/position on waiting list).

I knew there was a lot to be done post-adoption...but didn't realize I guess, the scope of it all. Whew! I'm worn out just reading it all. I know it will be more than worth it...but wow! Thank you for all of this information.

thanks

Yes, there are plenty of people still out here. I just came across your blog and it made me cry for two hours while reading it. I have to send many thanks because your blog is an incredible source of information, and it makes me feel better to know that I am not alone in my depression and misery. glad that your situation worked out in the end.

Nic

I just found your blog too! I typed in "ivf cycle change to iui" and the link came up. What a wonderful blog and so helpful to see EVERYTHING. My best friend just adopted a baby boy and I just started the ivf route and seeing your thoughts are so similar to what we're going through. Thank you for all the info! (especially the adoption - it's such a mystery!)

Jennifer Custer

The listing of all the supporting documentation for the N-600 was SO WONDERFUL. I have been trying to get this type of information as I work on submitting my form. Did you have your photocopies notarized? Thanks.
Jennifer; jcuster@iupui.edu

Kiwi

Hi,
I just wanted to say thanks.
Yesterday we found out that our second pregnancy was another ectopic.
The first (two months ago) ruptured.
This time it decided to die itself.
So as I do when I'm upset, I googled...and came across your blog.
Pretty much all last night and today I've been reading. I have read every post.
And I just wanted to say that you are a fantastic writer and to thank you for making me laugh, cry, taking my mind of my own problems and making me realise that others out there have gone through this too.
Thanks for sharing your story.

Gen

Thanks for writing this. I know it's years later now, but it was all very timely for me. Just getting on the IVF bandwagon now...only 5 eggs...already been through 2 ectopics before trying IVF. Been debating adoption for a long time, but promised to give IVF a go at least once before moving on. It was very cathartic to hear your story. After stumbling upon it, I read for hours. I especially "liked" the one where you talked about crying in the clinic room and having both the doctor and nurse leave you there...so similar to my experiences...it made me feel a little bit better to know that it's not just me. Thank you for posting all of this.

Amy

Yes, there's someone still out here! Thank you for sharing your story! I will be referring back to it often, as we are just beginning the adoption process. You are an answer to prayer!! As far as infertility treatment is concerned...been there, done that. Time to move on. The wait of adoption is what is so overwhelming to me right now. As I said, we're just getting started, so to think that I have a MINIMUM of 2 years ahead of me where I'll remain childless, all the while thinking about all the "what if's?" I'm able to conjure up for these upcoming years (I'm 35, my husband 39), makes my head spin and my heart sink. But you give me hope. And a whole lot of INCREDIBLE INFORMATION. Thank you so much again for sharing your story! And I'm so happy you finally have your family!

jj

Thank you for sharing this story. I am going through an ectopic pregnancy and found your blog. I couldn't stop reading. It all worked out in the end. Congratulations and have a happy life.

endobaby

Hiiiii! I used to read your blog years ago. Are you able to update us at all?

Kristina

Thank you for sharing your story. I cried, I laughed and most of all I admire your bravery and brutal honesty.

The comments to this entry are closed.

Adoption To-Do's

  • 

    Total Expenses So Far: $21,531

    Select country (Korea) (11/14/05)

    Select agency (11/17/05)

    Tell our families

    Receive preliminary application

    Preliminary App filed (12/5/05):

    • Fill in application
    • Photo of us, photo of house
    • Write medical statement, elaborating on treatment for depression
    • Line up four non-relative references
    • One copy of tax returns from past three years
    • Pay $200 fee
    • Notarized adoption services agreement $10
    • Fedex to Agency $15

    Receive Big App (12/15/05)

    Receive Korea Adoption Guidebook

    Home Study Paperwork: (1/19/06)

    • S: Complete "Personal Data" form with 67 essay questions
    • S: 1 photocopy birth certificate
    • S: Complete Authorization of Release of Information - Employer Verification
    • S: Criminal Record Statement
    • S: LiveScan fingerprint form (for State of California: criminal and child abuse index)
    • S: Schedule LiveScan fingerprinting appointments
    • S: LiveScan fingerprints done, pay $65
    • S: Medical Exam, including HIV and TB tests
    • S: Medical Report filled out by doctor
    • T: Complete 51 essay question "Personal Data" form
    • T: 1 photocopy birth certificate
    • T: Complete Authorization of Release of Information - Employer Verification
    • T: Criminal Record Statement
    • T: LiveScan fingerprint form (for State of California: criminal and child abuse index)
    • T: Schedule LiveScan fingerprinting appointments
    • T: LiveScan fingerprints done, pay $65
    • T: Medical Exam, including HIV and TB tests
    • T: Medical Report filled out by doctor
    • Complete detailed Financial Statement
    • 1 photocopy marriage license
    • Photo of baby's room
    • Map & directions to home
    • Copy all, keep for records
    • FedEx packet to agency, $15 (1/12/06)
    All 4 non-relative references return 3-page, 10-essay questionnaires directly to agency (1/28/06)

    Home Study Part 2: (4/3/2006)

    • Receive & pay invoice for home study $3066 (2/1/06)
    • Schedule social worker visits (2/10/06)
    • Childproof house (smoke detectors, fire extinguishers, outlet covers) $40
    • Social worker visit #1 (joint) (2/21/06)
    • Acceptable Medical Conditions Form (2/27/06)
    • From that details how "open" an adoption we are willing to consider  (2/27/06)
    • Social worker visit #2 (S only) (2/28/06)
    • Social worker visit #3 (T only) (2/28/06)
    • Sign up for module 1 & 2 of parenting class
    • Book travel for parenting class in Southern California
    • Modules 1 & 2 of agency parenting class (in SoCal) $500 (1/21/06)
    • Receive 2 completed, certified, notarized copies of Home Study (4/3/2006)

    Agency sends Home Study to Korea (HSTK) (4/7/2006)

    Sign up for modules 3 & 4 of agency parenting class

    Take modules 3 & 4 of agency parenting class (4/9/06)

    I-600A filed with US-CIS (Advanced Processing of Orphan Petition for Visa) (4/6/2006):

    • I-600A form
    • Copy certified Home Study
    • S: Photocopy of birth certificate
    • T: Photocopy of birth certificate
    • Photocopy of marriage license
    • Copy of most recent federal tax return
    • Proof of medical insurance
    • $545 fee + $140 for FBI fingerprints = $685
    • Cover letter
    • Copy all for records
    • Mail to US-CIS San Francisco

    FBI Fingerprinting:

    • US-CIS acknowledges receipt of I-600A (4/12/06)
    • FBI Fingerprinting appt. scheduled (different than LiveScan fingerprints)
    • FBI Fingerprinting completed, for each (4/28/06)

    Receive I-171H (Approval of I-600A) (5/11/06)

    Pick baby name

    Arrange for medical evaluation of referral

    Receive Referral (12/29/06)

    • Child's presentation letter
    • Child's information
    • Photographs
    • Medical records
    • Confidential background information

    Medical evaluation of Referral by Oakland Children's Hospital (1/10/2007)

    File Referral Acceptance Paperwork: ($140 + $12) (1/6/2007)

    • Child Information Transmittal
    • Pay invoice for $17,500
    • 3 Placement Agreements - all notarized
    • T: 4 Statements of Adoption (for child's Korean passport) - all notarized
    • 3 Travel Option forms
    • 1 Foreign Travel Release - notarized
    • T: 2 Affidavit re INS Vaccination Requirements
    • T: 2 I-864 Affidavit of Support for Immigration
    • S: 2 I-864A Contract between Sponsor and Household Member
    • Copy of entire last year tax return, with ALL attachments
    • Copy of all last year W-2 and 1099 forms
    • T: Photocopy of birth certificate (again)
    • S: Photocopy of birth certificate (again)
    • T: Copy of 2006 paystubs
    • S: Copy of 2006 paystubs
    • Photocopy of marriage license (again)
    • Photocopy everything for records
    • FedEx to agency (1/6/2007)

    Receive child's "legals" from Korea (in English & Korean): (1/22/2007)

    • Affirmation and Oath Certificate (attests these documents are true and correct)
    • Certificate of the Guardian (certifies Korean agency was guardian)
    • Statement of Guardianship (transfers guardianship from Korean agency to American agency)
    • Extract of Family Register (birth certificate equivalent)

    I-600 visa petition form filed w/ US-CIS: (1/25/2007)

    • I-600 form
    • Copy of I-171H
    • Copies of child's legals
    • Originals of child's legals, with note and SASE envelope requesting they be returned
    • Copy of child report
    • Copy of child photos
    • Copy of most recent 1040 tax form
    • Copy of I-864
    • Copy of I-864A
    • Letter with visa cable instructions
    • Fedex to US-CIS San Francisco $25

    Meanwhile, the Korean agency works away:

    • Our application is translated
    • Korean agency applies for Emigration Permit with Korean Ministry of Health and Welfare
    • Ministry approves Emigration Permit (aka "EP")
    • Agency gets I-171 (I-600 approval) cable from US Embassy in Seoul
    • Baby tested for Hepatitis B & HIV
    • Visa physical for baby
    • Submit application for baby's IR-4 Visa

    Resubmit our I-600 visa petition after US-CIS screws up (2/9/2007)

    Buy baby gear (3/17/07)

    Baby CPR & safety class (2/17/07)

    Line up a regular pediatrician (3/5/07)

    Line up a pediatric cardiologist (3/14/07)

    Investigate childcare options (3/17/07)

    Line up Daycare (5/25/07)

    Get on preschool waiting list (1/5/07)

    Setup nursery(3/19/07)

    Get life insurance for both

    Write wills with statements of guardianship wishes (both)

    Set up trust

    S: Get pre-approval family leave with HR (1/24/2007)

    Buy gifts for foster family, Korean agency staff (3/16/07)

    Make travel arrangements to Korea ($185 plus 240,000 frequent flyer miles) (3/13/07)

    Wrap-up job for a 15-week leave (3/12/07-3/16/07)

    Finalize leave plans with HR (3/15/07)

    Travel to Korea (3/19/07 - 3/25/07)

    • Meet both foster mothers (3/21/07, 3/22/07, 3/23/07)
    • In-Korea pre-flight medical exam (3/22/07)
    • Go to US Embassy in Seoul to process Class-B Waiver (acceptance of medical condition) 3/22/07
    • Get the final Visa paperwork (3/22/07)
    • Take custody of child! (3/23/07)
    • Long plane ride back to USA (3/25/07)

    USA Medical Evaluations

    • Add baby to my health insurance (3/28/07)
    • Evaluation by regular pediatrician (3/30/07)
    • US immunizations (3/30/07)
    • Evaluation by pediatric cardiologist (4/18/07)
    Receive Placement Confirmation Notice from Agency (3/28/06)

    Receive baby's Green Card in mail (4/16/07)

    Get social security number under baby's Korean Name as permanent resident (4/27/07)

    Receive post-placement packet in mail from Agency(4/15/07)

    Post-placement visits from social worker: (9/12/07)

    • Visit #1 (4/28/07)
    • Visit #2 (6/30/07)
    • Visit #3 (7/26/07)
    • Visit #4 (9/12/07)

    Create and file child "progress reports" with 8-18 photos each, for Korean agency and government, and a letter with photos for foster family (9/12/07)

    • 1-month progress report (4/28/07)
    • 3-month progress report (6/30/07)
    • 4-month progress report (7/26/07)
    • 6-month progress report (9/12/07)

    File US Physician's Examination Report with Agency (4/17/07)

    File Adoption Finalization Paperwork in our county in California (5/1/07) ($20)

    • Form ADOPT-200 (Adoption Request) (5/1/07)
    • Form ADOPT-210 (Adoption Agreement) (5/1/07)
    • Form ADOPT-215 (Adoption Order) (5/1/07)
    • Form ADOPT-230 (Adoption Expenses) (5/1/07)

    RE-File Finalization Paperwork the State changed in July '07 (ARGH!) (11/13/07)

    • Form ADOPT-210 (Adoption Agreement) (11/13/07)
    • Form ADOPT-215 (Adoption Order) (11/3/07)

    Finalize Adoption in County Court

    • Receive "Consent to Adoption" from agency (11/2/07)
    • Schedule court hearing (coming in December '07!)
    • Adoption finalization court hearing (Munchkin is now a US citizen, and his American name is now his legal name!)
    • Have a HUGE Party to celebrate!
    • Send agency/Korea copy of child's adoption decree (child is no longer considered a Korean citizen)
    • Send adoption announcements

    Secure proof of US citizenship for child:

    • Complete & file N-600 with US-CIS, pay fee
    • Receive Certificate of Citizenship
    • File passport application
    • Receive passport
    • Apply to SSA to get status changed from resident alien to citizen, SS# name changed (passport is proof)

    Start the process all over again for kid #2!